I have D-I-D..
I think I have DID. No, this is not a blog about self confessive sluts talking about sexually transmitted diseases(because that's STD, not DID).... Reading this, I think most of my closer friends will immediately translate it to ‘Damsel in Distress’ because that’s also one of my famous traits (especially when a policeman stops me for committing a traffic offence). But today, I’m referring to Dissociative identity disorder. Now, what the hell is that? The definition given by wikipedia is.."Dissociative identity disorder is a diagnosis described as the existence in an individual, two or more distinct identities or personalities, each with its own pattern of perceiving and interacting with the environment."
I mean, sometimes I don’t know what to make of myself. With the gweilo hubby and all, one moment I’m trotting about looking like a super SPG, but another moment, I’m secretly driving to work every morning listening to Chinese pop songs and Jacky Cheung.... Whenever Narrrling's not home on one of his far yonder travels, I entertain myself nightly with watching 'Wah Lai Toi' and Chinese drama serials.
Beng, who knows my secret trait, loves to call me on these nights and ask me what I’m watching on TV. “What are you watching, Lin Fa? The O.C? Desperate Housewives? National Geographic? CNN News?”…
Very happily I’ll reply, “No.. I’m watching Tai Kik Cheong Sam Foong!” a.k.a “The Legend of the Tai Chi Master”.. and each time he’ll have such a kick hearing me admit it..
For some reason, it seems very funny when my friends hear me telling them that I luuuurve watching Chinese Drama series…I remember Metria even told me once, that she didn’t know I can speak Chinese... Halllooo… I don’t only speak Chinese, ok, I can speak Mandarin, Cantonese and blardy two types of Hakka ok.. dun pray pray…
Ooops.. the writing of this blog was suddenly interrupted for 3 minutes.. Narrrling recently started this new habit of whenever he sees me sitting comfortably on the carpet, he would come by and push me over to lie flat on my back and then start making noises of a busy road traffic and then crawl over me.. After he crawls over my head, he would say, “Ha ha ha, Roadkill! Roadkill!”…Yeah, a bit weird, my hubby.. But these ‘Roadkill’ moments really cracks me up.. I must say, Narrrling has very creative ways of making people laugh..
Ok, back to my DID problem. One moment I’m married to Narrrling the blue eyed blondie.. Another moment, I’m secretly fantasizing about meeting Jacky Cheung one day and marrying him still… I know, I know, he’s married with 2 kids himself.. I won’t go to hell for fantasizing, right?
Sometimes I think if I was Chinese educated, I will never have this dual personality complex. At least then, the books I read and the TV shows I watch will one way or another collide, isn’t it? Don’t get me wrong, I also immensely enjoy Western TV shows.. All the weekly series like Desperate Housewives, American Idol, Lost, I must say I will die if I miss a week of it. It is a fact that ‘English’ is my true forte because I express myself best in this language and there are no inhibitions to topics of discussions. But yet I know, Chinese is my mother tongue but sometimes I do feel a bit strange that as my mother tongue, I can never dwell into it any deeper than the basic entertainment because of the inhibitions of not being able to read or write the language.
To conclude, I think over the years, I have learnt to live with my dubious personality. Continue to dress, look and speak like the human sized banana and then ocassionally surprise someone with the ocassional, “Yes, I AM Chinese and I DO speak Chinese and dun pray pray, I know who Jacky Cheung is ok and I love him sooo much”... And for that, poor Narrrling, he still thinks his wife is infatuated with Jacky Chan...Haha... He thinks his wife has got such bad taste..
posted by Miki-C @ 11:20 PM
5 Comments:
I think it is ok to listen to Jackie Cheung and watch Wah Lai Toi because it is the only time you get in touch with your routes....since you are now married to a gweilo
I think it's worse than DID, you seem to have multiple personalities.
Let's see - there's Ms Anti Social who emerges at lunch time, there's Ms Mat Salleh Chef who tries to make western dishes like scones while secretly wishing you were making popiah instead, there's Ms Bimbo who pretends to be the world's biggest bimbo when in fact that brain of yours actually works well ... and we all know there's a little Ms India waiting to come out, going by your love of Indian stuff and songs.
And don't bluff, it's not Wah Lai Toi you're watching ... it's Vaanavil, isn't it?
Beng, you again ah? This time under the pseudonym of "Siu Loong Lui".
Metria, yeah, i'm an aspiring indian.. Then i can have the big eyes and all, instead of this 'mata sepet'. And Vaanavil is such a great channel.. They constantly sing songs that start with.. "Piar..."
people with d.i.d won't know they have it. your core personality isn't fragmented, unfortunately =( but it's nice to see your faith in the existence of d.i.d =D
oh and read the DSM IV-R definition - instead of wikipedia's =P
I think DID is quite common.....most people have split personalities at some point. Life is a constant change....and we do different things, act differently at a different time. Imagine if you are just same all the time, life is like a black and white picture :-) aka BORING
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